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ONE
BOX 1: In the blink of an eye
• Eye blocking: feel threatened and/or don’t like what we see
...

BOX 2: Actions speak louder than words
• When people are lying about what they did, their body language usually tells
the opposite from their verbal testimony
...


Following the Ten Commandments for Observing
1
...
Observing in context is key to understanding nonverbal behavior
---Be aware of where the behaviors come from
3
...

BOX 4: A pursing o flips leads to savings on ships
• Lip compression: People press lips together in a manner that seems to make
them disappear; it is a clear and common sign that they are troubled and
something is wrong
...
Learn to recognize and decode idiosyncratic nonverbal behaviors
---Be on the lookout for behavioral patterns in people you interact with on a
regular basis
...

5
...

---To recognize and identify what’s abnormal by examining what’s normal
...

[Note features of face when not stressed
...
Always try to watch people for multiple tells---behaviors that occur in
clusters or in succession

---To enhance the accuracy of reading people, you should observe multiple
tells, or clusters of behavior body signals on which to rely
...
It’s important to look for changes in a person’s behavior that can signal
changes in thoughts, emotions, interests, or intent
...

---Changes in a person’s behavior also reveal the interest or intentions in
certain circumstances
...
Learning to detect false or misleading nonverbal signals is also critical
---Concerted observation and careful judgment develops the ability to
differentiate between authentic and misleading cues
...
Knowing how to distinguish between comfort and discomfort will help you to
focus on the most important behaviors for decoding nonverbal
communications
...

10
...

---Don’t make your intentions obvious
...

BOX 6: A nose for trouble
• Pay attention to the changes which involve intention cues
• Nostrils flaring (nasal wing dilation): He is oxygenating in advance of taking
some action



















TWO
There are three “brains” in human skull: reptilian (stem) brain; mammalian (limbic)
brain; human (neocortex) brain
...



In our study of nonverbal communications, the limbic brain is where the action is
...

The limbic brain is also our emotional center
...

This is the part of the brain that distinguished us from other mammals due to the
large amount of its mass (cortex) used for thinking
...





In order to ensure our survival, the brain’s very elegant response to distress or
threats has taken three parts: freeze, flight, and fight
...
The behaviors it
generates should be given greater importance when interpreting nonverbal
communications
...


The Freeze Response
• The first defense of the limbic system was to use the freeze response in the
presence of danger
...

• Playing dead is the ultimate freeze reaction
...

• When people feel threatened or exposed, they freeze
...

• This mimicry or isopraxism (same movement) evolved because it was critical
to communal survival
...

• People hold their breath or their breathing becomes very shallow as a limbic
freeze reaction
...

• People try to hide their physical presence by restricting their motions or
hunching over as if trying to be invisible
...

This done by raising the shoulders and lowering the head---the “turtle
effect
...
)
• Abused children tend to avoid eye contact as though that helps them not to
be seen
...

• People turn away from things or individuals that are undesirable
...

• The person may also distance herself from someone by leaning away, placing
objects on her lap, or turning her feet toward the nearest exit
...


•
•
•

•
•

•

People turn fear into rage in order to fight off attackers
...

The use of insults, ad hominem phrases, counter allegations, denigration of
professional stature, goading, and sarcasm are all modern equivalents of
fighting
...

Modern decorum dictates that we refrain from acting on our primitive
inclinations to fight when threatened
...


•

Comfort/discomfort and pacifiers
Our brain and body work together to comfort us and give us confidence in our
personal safety
...


The importance of pacifying behaviors
Whenever there is a limbic response---especially to a negative or threatening
experience---it will be followed by pacifying behaviors
...

E
...
chewing gum, biting pencils, touching neck or mouth
...
g
...


BOX 8: The night the hands stopped moving
• Frozen hands happen when sudden fright occurs---hardwired communal
response to perceived danger
...
When the “point man” freezes,
everyone freezes
...

• Conversely, the limbic system also works efficiently to register and retain a
record of positive events and experiences
...

BOX 10: Captured in the neck of time
• Neck touching and/or stroking is one of the most significant and frequent
pacifying behavior we use in responding to stress
...
[Distressed, threatened, uncomfortable, insecure,
fearful]---experienced when a person is lying or concealing important
information
...

Sometimes we pacifying by rubbing our cheeks or our lips from the inside
with our tongues when nervous, irritated or concerned
...

Exhaling with puffed our cheeks is a great way to release stress and to pacify
...

All these pacifying behaviors satisfy the same requirement of the brain; that
is, the brain requires the body to do something that will stimulate nerve endings,
releasing calming endorphins in the brain, so that the brain can be soothed
...

People have personal favorites, some choose to chew gum, smoke cigarettes,
eat more food, lick their lips, rub their chins, stroke their faces, play with objects,
pull the hair, or scratch their forearms
...


Pacifying behaviors involving the neck
Men tend to massage or stroke their necks to pacify distress
...

Men typically cover their necks more robustly than women as a way to deal with
discomfort or insecurity
...

When a woman is pregnant, her hand will initially wove toward her neck but at the
last moment will divert to her belly
...

• When the distress is over, her right hand will lower and relax across her
folded arm
...

Rubbing the forehead; touching, rubbing, or licking the lip; pulling or massaging the
earlobe with thumb and forefinger; stroking the face or beard; and playing with the
hair all can be pacifying responses
...

Excessive yawning is also a sign of stress
...

• Watch people who put one or both arms under the table
...

• An increase in either the number or vigor of leg cleansers is a very good
indicator that a question has caused some discomfort for the person, either
because he has guilty knowledge, is lying, or because you are getting close to
something he does not want to discuss
...


The ventilator
• For men, ventilating of the neck area relieves stress and emotional
discomfort
...
g
...

• For women, she may merely ventilate the front of her blouse or toss the back
of her hair up in the air to ventilate her neck
...

• If a person with his arms in front, leaning forward, and giving you a defiant
look, this is not a pacifying behavior
...
Recognize pacifying behaviors when they occur
...
Establish a pacifying baseline for an individual
...
Try to find out the causes of pacifying behaviors of individuals
...
Understand that pacifying behaviors almost always are used to calm a person
after a stressful event occurs
...
Liking a pacifying behavior with the specific stressor helps you better
understand the person
...
In certain circumstances you can say or do something to see if it stresses an
individual to better understand his thoughts and intentions
...
Note what part of the body a person pacifies
...
)














































8
...


Three
Feet are the most honest part of body
...

Our feet and legs still react as they did in prehistoric times
...

This freeze, flight, or fight mechanism requires no high-order cognitive processing
...


Significant nonverbal behaviors involving the feet and legs

Happy Feet
• Happy feet are feet and legs that wiggle and/or bounce with joy
...
If his feet are wiggling or bouncing,
his shirt and shoulders will be vibrating or moving up and down
...
Happy face must be taken in context to determine if they present a
true tell or just excess nervous behavior
...
g
...

However, if the rate of intensity increases, especially after hearing or
witnessing something of significance, it might mean that person now
feels more confident and satisfied with the current state of affairs
...
Moving feet and legs may simply signify impatience
...
”
BOX 14: A sign of the feet
• The sudden stop of bouncing feet signifies unpleasant feeling
...

Swiveling at the hips shows fake welcome
...


BOX 15: How feet wave goodbye
When people talk to each other, they normally speak toe to toe
...

The person’s torso may remain facing you out of social diligence though
...


Gravity-defying behaviors of the feet
Rocking up and down on the balls of our feet, or walking with a bit of bounce in our
steps are signs of gravity defying because of positive emotions
...

Gravity-defying behaviors of the feet and legs are rarely seen in people suffering
from clinical depression
...

Shifting feet from a resting position to a ready or “starter’s” position with heel
elevated and weight on the balls on the balls of the feet tells us that the person is
getting ready to do something physical, requiring foot movement
...



Leg splay
Territorial displays
Most mammals can become territorial when they are stressed or upset, being
threatened or they are threatening others
...

People splay out their legs when they find themselves in confrontational situation
...
”
Predators (e
...
, psychopaths, antisocials) often use this leg-splay behavior in
conjunction with eye-gaze behavior to conjunction with eye-gaze behavior to
control others
...

Edward Hall found that the more advantaged we are socioeconomically or
hierarchically, the more territory we demand
...

Violations of personal space cause us to become hyper vigilant; our pulse races and
we may become flushed
...
Sudden presence of uncomfortable feeling
causes us to uncross legs
...
(A comfort sign known as isopraxism)
People cross their legs and tilt toward the person they like the most
...

Women play with her shoes and dangle them from the tips of her toes when she
feels comfortable with her companion
...

If people are on good terms, the top leg crossed over will point toward the other
person
...


BOX 16: Getting a toehold on romance
• Touches on feet shows close relationships
...

Three responses likely to take place:
a) The person will remain the place, which shows it is comfortable at that
distance
...

c) The individual takes a step closer, which shows he is comfortable
...

Changes in the walking styles can reflex changes in their thoughts and emotions
...


BOX 17: Crime shoppers
• People who walk on the inside of sidewalk, habitually changing their walking
speed as they aimlessly shopped may attempt to do something
...
noncooperative feet
Mirroring behaviors shows cooperation
...

We turn our attention from hips up towards strangers on the street
...

A shift from foot jiggling to foot kicking in a seated person may indicate that the
person has received something negative
...


Foot freeze
If a person constantly wiggles or bounces his feet or legs and suddenly stops, this
usually signifies stress, and emotional change, or feels threatened in some way
...

Some women normally sit like this, especially in a skirt
...

People tend to restrict arm and leg movements when lying
...
)
The sudden locking of ankles around the legs of a chair shows discomfort, anxiety,
or concern
...
E
...
, movement of
feet from in front of the chair to under the chair

BOX 19: Make that a double freeze
• Multiple tells that point to the same behavioral conclusion
...

























Four
Significant nonverbal behaviors involving the torso, hips, chest, and shoulders
The torso lean
We tent to move away form anything dangerous or unwanted
...

It can be consciously hidden, but it won't last long
...

Distancing sometimes takes place abruptly or very subtly
...

• Other people lean their torso away form these people
...
---ventral denial
Our ventral (front) side, where our eyes, mouth, chest, breasts, genitals, etc
...

We expose ventral side to things of favor; we shift or turn away our ventral side
when things go wrong
...
---ventral fronting
We demonstrate comfort by using our torso and shoulders to lean in the direction of
that which we favor
...


The torso shield
When it is impractical or socially unacceptable to lean away from someone or
something we dislike, we often subconsciously use our arms or objects to act as
barriers across our torso
...

Clothing and how we attend to our clothes can influence perceptions and are even
suggestive of how approachable or open we are to others
...

Men tend to shield in a more subtle way, e
...
, reach across the front of himself to
play with his watch, reach over and adjust his shirtsleeve or play with his cuff links,
fix his tie knot perhaps longer than usual…
In public, many of us comfortably cross our arms while waiting or listening to a
speaker
...

Crosses arms with hands tightly gripping the arms is definitely an indication of
discomfort
...

• Feeling cold is also a sign of discomfort
...


BOX 22: Why you can’t stomach certain topics
• When you are upset, your blood is shifted from digestive system to your
heart and limb muscles to prepare for your escape
...


Torso Embellishments
If we want others to notice us, the torso is where it’s
...


BOX 24: You are what you wear
• Clothing often greatly influences what we think of individuals
...


Preening
When we are ill or the brain is saddened, preening and presentation is among the
first things to go
...


Puffing up the chest
Humans, like many other creatures, puff up their chests when trying to establish
territorial dominance
...


Baring the torso
Removing an article of clothing signifies a fight is in the offing
...

When the limbic system is aroused to flight or fight, the body attempts to take in as
much oxygen as possible, either by breathing more deeply or by panting
...


Shoulder shrugs
Partial shoulder shrugs indicate lack of commitment or insecurity
...
Look for both
shoulders to rise, when only one side raises, the message is dubious
...


So many of our vital organs are housed in torso, the limbic brain takes great care to
protect our torsos
...
In forensic science, such injuries are known as defense wounds
...

Swinging arms affirmatively shows happiness and confidence
...

Such physical manifestations can be contagious
...


Arm withdrawal
When we are fearful or upset, we withdraw our arms
...

Arm withdrawal is a pose of holding back
...

During severe intestinal distress, your arms are most likely drawn to your abdomen
for comfort
...


Restriction of arm movement
Arm freeze can sometimes have more sinister implications particularly when it
occurs in children
...
(Adults
may use objects)
A flailing arm is often the first thing an abusive parent will grab, leaving pressure
marks on the ventral side of the arms
...


BOX 29: Shoplifters’ tell
• They tend to look around a lot
...


Using arm cues to assess for mood or feelings
After a tough day or when feeling dejected or sad, the arms will be low at the
person’s side, shoulders dropping
...


Rather than holding arms straight out, they are only outstretched from the elbows,
with upper arms close at sides, this shows not positive emotions
...
” “Please don’t come near me; I am not to be touched
...

The armrest
...

High status people usually spread their arms or their objects on the table to claim
territories
...


Arm akimbo
Arm akimbo is used to assert dominance and project an image of authority
...

Women tend to use arms akimbo less than men
...

When the thumbs are forward in arm akimbo, this is a more inquisitive, less
authoritarian position than the previous one, where the thumbs are back in the
“there are issues” position
...


BOX 30: A pet peeve
• Dogs can’t stand it when humans withdraw their gaze and their arms
...


Hooding effect
When a person leans back and interlaces his hands behind his head, it is a sign of
territorial display
...

Arm spread behavior is a powerful limbic response employed to establish
dominance and emphasize a person’s point of view
...


In business meetings, a speaker who takes a larger territorial footprint is likely very
confident about what is being discussed
...

Fingertips planted spread apart on a surface are a significant territorial display of
confidence and authority
...


Arm behaviors in courtship
The man will often be the one to put his arm around his date
...


BOX 32: Spreading arms should spread alarms
• Ticket agents can often identify passengers who will become problematic by
how wide they position their arms when they are at the counter
...

• When we are confident we spread out, when we are less confident we
withdraw
...

Tattoos and Jewelries and scars
...

Drug users may have track lines along the veins of their arms
...


Arms as conduits of affection
When meeting a stranger for the first time, try demonstrating warmth by leaving
your arms relaxed, preferably with the ventral side exposed and perhaps even with
the palms of your hands clearly visible
...
Navarro, isn’t it true that you used to hug my client, the defendant, every
time you met with him?
o It wasn’t a hug, counselor, it was an abrazo, and there is a difference
...



To touch that person on the arm is one of the best ways to establish rapport with
someone
...

When there is no touching between people, you should be concerned why
...











































SIX
How appearance and nonverbal of the hands affect interpersonal perception
Not only do others’ hands communicate important information to us, but also our
own hand movements influence how others perceive us
...

We have a survival need to assess each other’s hands quickly to see what they are
saying or if they portend ill
...

We communicate more effectively when we employ our hands
...

• Adolf Hitler practiced speaking in front of mirror, and he filmed himself to
develop better hand gestures

Hiding your hands creates a negative impression: Keep them visible
People may regard you with suspicion if they can’t see your hands while you are
talking
...

When the hands are out of sight or less expressive, it detracts from the perceived
quality and honesty of the information being transmitted
...

• Hiding hands might not a sign of lying
...

Handshaking can be a defining moment in people’s relationship
...
Not recommended
...

People also insist on touching the inside (ventral) side of your wrist with their index
finger when they shake hands, in order to establish control and dominance
...
However, he may just want to show more politeness
...


BOX 37: When customs and intelligence gathering go hand in hand
• Long holding hands may be used to show trust
...
It has
negative connotations around the globe
...

Snapping your fingers at someone is also considered rude
...


Be cautious when using preening behaviors involving the hands
We use our fingers to preen our clothing, hair, and body when we are concerned
with how we look
...

Self-preening is a sign of dismissiveness when others are talking to you
...

Rough, calloused hands---manual labor
Scars---working on a farm or athletic wounds received on a playing field
Standing with hands at the side with fingers curled---prior military experience
Calluses on one hand’s fingertips---guitar player
Hands also indicate how much we care for ourselves and how we view social
convention
...


Learn how to manage sweaty hands
Sweaty hands happen both when we are warm and when we are nervous or under
stress
...

Putting people at ease when they are stressed is one of the best ways to insure more
honest, effective, and successful interaction
...

5% of the population sweats profusely, and chronic perspiration makes the palms
uncomfortably sweaty (hyperhidrosis) ---genetic disorder



Reading nonverbals of the hands

Nervousness in the hands sends an important message
The muscles that control our hands and fingers are designed for precise and fine
movements
...

Our hands also shake when we hear, see, or think of something that has negative
consequences
...
(Elongated objects, large but
light objects)
Positive emotions can also cause hands trembling
...

Observe the circumstances to tell fear or joy
...

Trembling hands are only relevant as a nonverbal communication when they
represent a change from someone’s normal hand movement
...

Change from baseline behavior is the most significant
...
It also shows that
the individual feels somehow endangered by the revelation of the crime
...

Similar to “praying hands,” but the fingers are not interlocked and the palms nay not
be touching
...

High-status people (lawyers, judges, medical doctors) often use steepling as part of
their daily behavioral repertoire because of their confidence in themselves and their
status
...

Steepling of hands, fingertip to fingertip, is one of the most powerful displays of
confidence we possess
...

More women embrace hand steepling and display it above the table
...

• When a prosecutor steeples as his witness testifies, the value of the
testimony is enhanced because the attorney is perceived as being confident
of the witness’s statements
...


Thumb displays
Thumbs up is almost always a nonverbal sign of high confidence, it’s also associated
with high status
...

Lawyers, college professors, and doctors are often seen grasping their lapels
simultaneously with their thumbs up in the air
...

Another gravity-defying behavior
...

The thumbs can suddenly disappear when there is less emphasis or emotions turn
negative
...

A high-status may be like this when he is casually relaxing
...

This behavior conveys that someone has transitioned from high confidence to low
confidence very quickly
...

• Often used as a sign of insecurity or social discomfort, thumbs in the pocket
transmit this message readily and thus should be avoided
...

Genital framing is a powerful dominance display
...

People’s arms tend to become very restrained while telling a lie and otherwise are
animated when telling the truth
...


BOX 42: A less than moving experience
• When people tell the truth, they make every effort to ensure that you
understand them
...

• Absence of expressive emotions and actions may show deception
...

If the situation becomes more stressful or if his confidence level continues to fall,
watch how suddenly gentle finger-to-palm stroking transitions to more dramatic
rubbing of interlaced fingers
...

When the fingers interlace to rub up and down, as in this photo, the brain is asking
for extra hand contact to pacify more serious concerns or anxiety
...


Neck touching
People who touch their necks while speaking are reflecting lower-than-normal
confidence or are relieving stress
...

It doesn’t decide deception
...


Microexpressions of the hands
A micro gesture is a very brief nonverbal behavior that occurs when a person is
attempting to suppress a normal response to a negative stimulus
...


Changes in hand behaviors can reveal important information
Sudden alterations in hand motion suggest an abrupt change in someone’s thought
and feelings
...

Gradual hand withdrawals are also worthy of note
...

When the hands stop illustrating and emphasizing, it is usually a clue to a change in
brain activity (perhaps because of a lack of commitment) and is cause for
heightened awareness and assessment
...
But sometimes it’s the brain communicating
a different sentiment or thought
...

People control their facial expression and put a false front
...
E
...
, tightening of jaw muscles, flaring of nose wings (naral wing dilation),
squinting of the eyes, quivering of the mouth, or lip occlusion (in which lips
seemingly disappear)
...

Jaw tightening---indication of tension
Squinting, furrowing of the forehead, and facial contortions are of distress or
discomfort
...

Positive emotions are revealed by the loosening of the furrowed lines on the
forehead, relaxation of muscles around the mouth, emergence of full lips (they are
not compressed or tight lipped), and widening of the eye area as surrounding
muscles relax
...


BOX 45: My lips say I love you, but my looks say otherwise
• Less-than-generous smile and tight jaw muscles---nervousness and tension
...

BOX 47: What you won’t see in an elevator
• Head tile says in a powerful way, “I am comfortable, I am receptive, I am
friendly
...


Interpreting nonverbal behaviors of the eyes
We have very little control over our eyes
...


Pupillary constriction and squinting as a form of eye blocking
Research has shown that once we move beyond a startle response, when we like
something we see, our pupils dilate; when we don’t, they constrict
...

When we become aroused, are surprised, or are suddenly confronted, our eyes open
up---not only do they widen, but the pupils also quickly dilate to let in the maximum
amount of available light, thus sending the maximum amount of visual information
to the brain
...
(So everything in front
of us thus becomes precisely focused so that we can see clearly and accurately in
order to defend ourselves or effectively escape
...
We squint when we are angry
or even when we hear voices, sounds, or music we don’t like
...

Squinting can be very brief---1/8 of second---but in real time may reflect a negative
thought or emotion
...

Arched eyebrows signify high confidence and positive feelings (a gravity-defying
behavior), whereas lowered eyebrows are usually sign of low confidence and
negative feelings, a behavior that indicates weakness and insecurity in a person
...

• Drop eyebrows too low---defeated child
...


Eyeblocking, or how the brain spares itself
Decrease in the size of eyes is a form of subconscious blocking behavior
...

People close their eyelids for a few moments when they hear bad news
...

When people hear tragic events, they may cup a hand completely over both eyes, put
one open hand over each eye, or black the entire face with an object, such as a
newspaper or book
...

Eye-blocking can also be a sign of low confidence
...
”
• A brief touch of the eyes during a conversation may give you a clue to a
person’s negative perception of what is being discussed
...

• Where the lids compress tightly, the person is trying to block out totally
some negative news or event
...

Contentment and positive emotions are indicated by pupil dilation
...

Some people dramatically expand the aperture of their eyes by opening their eyes as
big as possible, creating an appearance known as flashbulb eyes
...
)

Eye flash
A variant on the flashbulb eyes is the eyebrow raise or eye flash that takes place vey
quickly during a positive emotional event
...
)
Often, when we are not emotionally attached to something being said, there will be
no eye emphasis
...

People change their facial emphasis as they become less and less committed to what
they are saying or doing
...


Eye-gaze behavior
Predators use a direct gaze to either mesmerize or threaten
...

When we gaze away during a conversation, we tend to do so to engage a thought
more clearly without the distraction of looking at the person with whom we are
talking
...

Do not assume someone is being deceptive, disinterested, or displeased just because
he or she looks away
...

In many cultures, a downward gaze or other form of eye aversion is expected in the
face of authority in the presence of a high-status individual
...

Never assume that a downward gaze is a sign of deception
...

Don’t wander your eyes all over the room during a interview
...

A series of rapid eye blinks may reflect an inner struggle
...

Eye-blink frequency will likely increase in anyone under stress whether he is lying
or not
...

• In conversation, an onset of eyelid flutter indicates the subject has become
controversial or unacceptable and a change of topic is probably in order
...


Looking askance
Looking askance at others is a behavior that is performed with the head and eyes
...
Looking
askance is a display that is seen we are suspicious of others or question the validity
of what they are saying
...


Understanding nonverbal behaviors of the mouth
Like the eyes, the mouth can also be manipulated by the thinking brain and send out
false signals
...

A real smile appears primarily because of two muscles: the zygomaticus major,
which stretches from the center of the mouth to the cheekbone
...
When working together, these draw the corners of the mouth up
and crinkle the outer edges of the eyes, causing the crow’s feet of a familiar warm
and honest smile
...
These effectively pull the corners of the mouth
sideways but cannot lift them upward
...


Disappearing lips, lip compression, and the upside-down U
Lips disappear because of stress or anxiety
...
It is a clear sign that a person is troubled
and that something is wrong
...

• When the pips are full, usually the person is content
...

• Lip compression, reflecting stress or anxiety, may progress to the point
where the lips disappear
...



The lip purse
Pursing lips during a conversation usually mean they disagree with what is being
said or they are considering an alternative thought or idea
...
It is
disrespectful and reflects a lack of caring or empathy on the part of the person doing
the sneering
...

“I care little for you or your thoughts
...


Tongue displays
When we are stressed, causing our mouth to be dry, it is normal to lick our lips to
moisten them
...

We may stick out the tongue (usually to the side) as we focus assiduously on a task
or we may poke out our tongue to antagonize someone we dislike or to show
disgust
...
It further shows
that the person is insecure
...

Lip licking is a pacifying behavior that tends to soothe and calm us down
...

Tongue-jutting: tongue between lips without touching lips
...
”
In social or business discussions, this tongue-jut behavior is usually seen toward the
end of the dialogue, when one person feels he has gotten away with something and
the other party has failed to detect or pursue the matter
...

The furrowed forehead is usually present when someone finds himself in an
untenable or disagreeable situation but can’t escape, which is why you usually see it
on arrest mug shots

Nasal wing dilation (Nose flare)
The flaring of nostrils is a facial cue that signals that a person is aroused
...

As people prepare to act physically, they will oxygenate, which causes the nostrils
flare
...


Nail-biting and related signs of stress
Nail-biting is an indication of stress, insecurity, or discomfort
...


Facial blushing and blanching
People blush when personal space is violated, when they are caught doing
something they know is wrong, when a person likes someone but doesn’t want him
or her to know it
...

Blanching takes place as the involuntary nervous system hijacks all the surface
vessels and channels the blood to our larger muscles to prepare for escape or attack
...

Montevideo: Squinting eyes followed by a dismissive turn of face away shows
disapproval
...

Rolling eyes---disapproval and disrespect
Disgust likely registers primarily on the face because this is the part of out anatomy
that was adapted
...

• Cultural difference: shake head side to side in order to reject food is fine in
Latin America
...
This is very accurate but
at times fleeting
...


Gravity-defying behaviors of the face
A person with his chin down is seen as lacking confidence and experiencing negative
sentiments while a person with his chin up is perceived as being in a positive frame
of mind
...

When people are stressed or upset, the chin (and nose, since it must follow along)
tends not to be held high
...


The rule of mixed signals
Pay attention to conflicted facial expressions
...

Anything you observe on the face should be compared with the nonverbals of the
rest of the body
...

There is no single behavior that is indicative of deception---not lie
...

For us humans, lying is a “tool for social survival”

A new approach to uncover deception
When we are telling the truth and have no worried, we tend to be more comfortable
then when we are lying or concerned about getting caught because we harbor
“guilty knowledge
...

The more comfortable a person is when speaking with us, the easier it will be to
detect the critical nonverbals of discomfort associated with deception
...


Establishing a comfort zone for detecting deception
How you behave will affect the other person’s behavior
...

Be neutral, not suspicious
...

The best way to proceed is just to ask for even-more clarifying details about the
matter, such as a simple “I don’t understand” or “Can you explain how that
happened again?”

Defining signs of comfort
While seated at a table, people who are comfortable with each other will move
objects aside so that nothing blocks their view
...

When we are comfortable, there should be synchrony in our nonverbal behavior
...


If a person is standing while talking to us, leaning to the side with hands in the
pockets and feet crossed, most likely we will do the same
...

If harmony does not exist, they may sit differently, talk in a manner or tone different
from each other, or at the least their expressions will be at odds, it not totally
desperate
...

If the other party continually looks at the clock or sits in a way that is tense of lacks
movement, this is suggestive that there is no comfort, even though to the untrained
eye it may appear that everything is all right
...

You should be looking for signs of discomfort for possible deception
...

E
...
Our heart rate quickens, our hairs stand on end, we perspire more, and we
breathe faster
...

If you are attempting to observe discomfort as a potential indicator of deception, the
best setting is one that has no objects between you and the person
...

This is a sign that an individual wants distance, separation, and partial concealment
...
Leaning away, moving our torsos or our feet away or toward an exit…
These behaviors can occur during conversations either because of the difficult,
unnerving, or sour relationship between the parties involved or because of the
subject matter being discussed
...

People may show their displeasure by rolling their eyes in disrespect, picking lint off
themselves (preening), or talking down to the person asking the questions---giving
short answers, becoming resistant, hostile, or sarcastic, or even displaying
microgestures with indecent connotations such as giving the finger
...

Any diminution of touching observed in a person engaged in conversation,
especially while hearing or answering critical questions, is more likely then not to
be indicative of deception
...


A failure to touch does not directly lead to deception
...

Also watch for a person’s mouth to quiver or squirm in discomfort during a serious
discussion
...

Often when people are caught doing something wrong or lying, they will hold a
smile for what seems an eternity
...

Eyelid flutter is also observed at times when a particular subject causes distress
...

Predators and habitual liars actually engage in greater eye contact than most
individuals, and will lock eyes with you
...

Individuals belonging to certain groups of people (African Americans and Latin
Americans) may be taught to look down or away from parental authority out of
respect when questioned or being scolded
...

If, however, the head shake or head movement is delayed or occurs after the speech,
then most likely the statement is contrived and not truthful
...
If a
head movement is inconsistent with or contrary to a person’s statement, it may
indicate deception
...

During difficult conversations, you may also see increased perspiration or
breathing; note whether the person is noticeably wiping off sweat or trying to
control his or her breathing in an effort to remain calm
...

A person’s voice may crack or may seem inconsistent during deceptive speech;
swallowing becomes difficult as the throat becomes dry from stress, so look for hard
swallows
...


BOX 57: Building the wall
• Building of barrier indicates of distress and discomfort and most likely
signifies of lying
...
Get a clear view
...

2
...

A certain level of pacifying behaviors is normal
...
Expect initial nervousness
...
Get the person with whom you’re interacting to relax first
...

5
...

Once a person’s pacifying behaviors have decreased and stabilized to
normal (for the person), the interviewer can use that pacifying level as
a baseline for assessing future behavior
...
Look for increased use of pacifiers
...

7
...

Give the interviewee time to think and respond, and build in pregnant
pauses to achieve this objective
...
Keep the person you are interviewing focused
...
Pointed
questions elicit behavioral manifestations that are useful in assessing
a person’s honesty
...
Chatter is not true
...
Until the
information is verified, it is self-reported and perhaps meaningless
data
...
Stress coming in and going out
...
The first pattern will reflect the stress experienced when
hearing the question
...
) Followed by the second
set of pacifying behaviors such as neck touching, nose stroking, or
neck massaging as he ponders the question or answer
...

11
...

Don’t be so hasty to assume deception when you see someone
touching his or her nose
...
Pacifiers say so much
...


Two principal nonverbal behavioral patterns to consider in detecting deception
Synchrony
When being questioned, a person answering in the affirmative should have
congruent head movement that immediately supports what is said; it should not be
delayed
...

Note that when people are lack of consistent emotional displays, or are more
concerned about their own well-being and how they are perceived
...

There should be synchrony between events, time, and place
...


Emphasis
When we speak, we naturally utilize various parts of our body (the eyebrows, head,
hands, arms, torso, legs, and feet) to emphasize a point about which we feel deeply
or emotionally
...

Liars will engage their cognitive brains in order to decide what to say and how to
deceive, but rarely do they think about the presentation of the lie
...

We emphasize both verbally and nonverbally
...

Nonverbally: People typically use their hands while speaking punctuate their
remarks with hand gestures, even going so far as pounding on a desk as they
emphasize
...
Raising our eyebrows and widening our eyes are also ways of
emphasizing a point
...

We rise up on the balls of our feet when we make a significant or emotionally
charged point
...

People de-emphasize or show lack of commitment to their own speech by speaking
behind their hands (talking while covering their mouths) or showing limited facial
expression
...


Deceptive people often show deliberative, pensive displays, such as fingers to the
chin or stroking of cheeks, as though they are still thinking about what to say
...


Specific nonverbal behaviors to consider in detecting deception
Lack of emphasis in hand behavior
Lack of arm movement and lack of emphasis are suggestive of deception
...

Any sudden change in movement reflects brain activity
...

When the head, neck, arms, and legs are held in place with little movement and the
arms are clutching the armrest, such behavior is very much consistent with those
who are about to deceive, but again, it is not definitive
...
(Pounding fist on the table)
Deceptive people are lack of commitment and confidence in what they are saying
...


The rogatory position
When a person places his outstretched arms in front of his body, with palms up, this
is known as the rogatory (or “prayerful”) display
...
It is not a dominant, confident display
...


Territorial displays and deception
When we are confident and comfortable, we spread out
...

In extreme circumstances, distressed people may fold their arms and legs into their
own body, assuming an almost fetal position
...

Link the change with the topic being discussed
...

When people are being deceitful, they stoop or sink into the furniture as if they are
attempting to escape that is being said
...
g
...

(Turtle effect)




Shoulder shrugs
Liars give a modified shrug when they are unsure of themselves
...






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